You mean there is a link up for military wives across the blogosphere to talk about our experiences and the things we really wish people knew about being a military spouse? Naturally, I'm in." That was my reaction last week when I found out about said link-up. It's obvious from this blog that I am a military spouse, but there are definitely a few subjects I haven't really touched on that go hand in hand with this lifestyle. There are a ton of different stereotypes when it comes to military wives- some are good, some are not so flattering. It's something you can't truly understand until you've lived it, but allow me to give a little insight into the glamorous world of the military wife.
Let's back up for a second. Parker and I started dating in college when we were 19. We were babies! Okay, we still are. He was a Navy contract, something that never deterred me nor encouraged me to date him. I fell in love with a man who happened to be contracted to serve in the Navy. When you're 19 and won't graduate for 3 years, the Navy really isn't something on the forefront of your mind. When Parker and I got more serious in our relationship and knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together, the Navy was still a non-factor. Don't get me wrong, I couldn't be prouder to be a military wife, but I would have married Parker regardless. Like I said, I fell in love with a man who happened to be going into the Navy.
scenes from the early days
Everyone has different ideas about military life, but the one thing we can probably all agree on is that military life is an adventure. We have lived in Pensacola, FL, Kingsville, TX, Corpus Christi, TX, and will be heading to Norfolk, VA next month. Four moves in under three years of marriage is nothing short of an adventure, I'll tell you that much! Something a lot of people don't know though? Being a military wife is really fun! I may be in the 1% with this mindset, but I get excited about the moves. I get excited to meet new people and decorate a new house. I get excited to make new memories in new places. It's just plain fun.
I feel like a lot of people look at military wives and feel sorry for us, and that's my biggest pet peeve. Some people view it as the guy dragging you all across the country and away from your family and then leaving you for long periods of time while you have to hold down the home front. Um, no. I mean, yes, that's the negative way to state the reality, but I chose this life. I chose to move across the country. I chose to support Parker at home when he has to go away. I chose Parker. Therefore, I chose this lifestyle. It was my choice. I can't speak for all military wives, but I don't want people to ever pity me. I covet prayers and support during the hard times, but I never, ever want people to feel sorry for me. I love this life! But more importantly, I was fully aware of what I signed up for.
The second thing I wish people knew about being a military wife? You did not earn your husband's rank. I cannot tell you how much it frustrates me when people throw around their husband's rank like they somehow did something to earn it. We are women who fell in love with men who serve our country. Our husbands have ranks. We do not. We are all on an equal playing field, and I think it's our job to build each other up and support each other, not brag because our husband is this or feel inferior because our husband is that. There is no rank between the wives. If there is, there certainly shouldn't be.
All in all, I love this life. I can't imagine being anything but a military wife. So bring on the short-notice moving and constant readjusting. Life's about the journey, not the destination.
25 comments :
You guys are too cute.
Too precious. I nominated you for a Liebster Award! Check it out!! http://blogwiththebrowns.blogspot.com/2014/04/a-leibster-award.html
Also- can't wait till you move!!
I love this post. I agree with you completely (even though I have limited experience).
You guys are awesome! :)
Chelsea, I SO appreciate your thoughts on wearing our husbands' rank. There are definitely some Army wives here, especially in the FRG, who feel that they EARNED their husband's rank. I'm a firm believer that my husband's rank is his own. I'm dang proud of him and all he's done to earn it, but I didn't earn it and it isn't mine to flaunt. LOVE this :)
Yay!! Good writing! I love the part about the ranks. I wasn't in too long to experience that but I heard about it. Ugh! Especially if I was friends with a wife whose husband was an officer and mine wasn't and how we couldn't fraternize. What?! Anyways I loved my short life in the military!
I love our military life, too! Of course it's sad to move and leave friends, but getting to move around a lot, is really quite exciting! Our road trip out to SD last summer was such a great time! Although want to stay in SD as long as possible, I can't wait for another move/road trip across the country! :)
It is safe to say y'all are one of my most favorite couples in the entire universe!
Love that you are so positive about it and look at the perks rather than dwell on certain situations. I think it is all in how you view it!
Chelsea, Your outlook on the situation is what many many people should have. It's a duty and a responsibility to support all our men and women in the military, as well as all other fields that protect us civilians. They need support from their families and friends always, and especially from their spouses! Keep up what your doing! I love to hear your positive outlook on what can be a high stress job! :-)
Where is this link up? I would love to join in!!
I think it's fun too! I can't wait for orders to our next station! It can be a hard life but it can be so rewarding as well.
ya'll are too cute and take such great pics. so photogenic :D Hope you are having a great week girl. would love to hear from you.
The rank thing is my biggest peeve...ever! I love the photos. Y'all are absolutely adorable!!
The pictures of the two of yall are so cute! =)
-Jennie
http://thediaryofarealhousewife.blogspot.com/
You guys are adorable!! And I love your outlook; I tend to be a negative Nancy at times because I really miss my family and feel guilty my kids don't have their grandparents around and vice versa. But I certainly agree with the part about feeling bad for us.. Unnecessary! There are a lot of perks of military life too :)
Thanks for linking up!! Xo
Y'all are too cute!! I am so excited that y'all are moving closer. yay!! I can't believe that people feel bad for you. I also love the fact that you say I love a man who just happened to the Navy.
This post was so fun to read! I'm enjoying everyone's today!! :)
The rank discussion drives me crazy too... why don't you tell me his name? I don't really care what rank he is... haha!
The rank discussion drives me crazy too... why don't you tell me his name? I don't really care what rank he is... haha!
Came across you on the link up! Glad to hear that someone else can find the positives about military life! I love traveling and it definitely helps us narrow down where we want to put down roots eventually.
You explained the pity stares well. I hate those too. I will say about the spouse thinking they earn the rank, it shouldn't be that way, but unfortunately some wives do separate themselves because of the rank their military member holds. It is really sad to see that play out. That may be a branch by branch thing, so I may see it more in the Army than you do in the Navy. This was great though! I can't wait to see what everyone writes for the link up!
Love, love, love this post! I too enjoy moving. We've been here for almost two years and after moving every year for 3 years.. I'm ready! LOL. You also nailed it with the pet peeves.. don't pity me for "following my husband" across the country. I don't do it blindly, I do it willingly! Stopping by from the link up! Great post!
I love reading this post! It seems like a lot of bloggers are military wives!
Hi there :) I really appreciate your blog. As a brand spanking new Navy wife, I've been scouring google for good blog resources. Like you, I'm excited about the adventures awaiting us and the opportunity to see some places we've never seen before. I really appreciate your respect for your husband and helpful information available on your blog! My husband and I literally have very little idea what to expect with the Navy. This is a brand new adventure for us and it's exciting and scary at the same time! Anyways, thanks for being a part of blogging military wives. I'm sure I'll be using your blog as a resource often in the next few months. I'm definitely going to need the help!
~Sarah, new Navy wife
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