Maybe this was the direction you've always wanted your life to go. You are entering into a world of adventure, travel, and love with your best friend, and you are so ready to get this military journey started. Or maybe, you're like I was. You grew up in a small town and lived minutes from family and could have never imagined packing up and moving across the country after graduation.
Maybe you grew up dreaming of the white picket fence. You wanted a husband with an 8-5 job, toddling kiddos, and grandparents that live right down the road. And now you're looking at your future realizing that will not be your reality. And it's scary.
I want to take today to give three pieces of advice, from one military spouse to another. Take it or leave it, but these are things I wish someone would have told me.
The first, and easily the most important, is that you have a choice to make. Right here, right now, you get to choose how much you are going to like military life. You get to decide if you will just survive or if you will thrive. Choose to thrive. See the joy and the good and relish in the adventure. You get one life, so don't waste your time being upset about the things you can't control.
Secondly, don't compare. Don't keep a list of "things I can't do because we are in the military". Don't envy your friends back home for their "normal" lives. Don't resent them for whining about missing their husbands for a weekend when yours has been deployed 8 months. Comparison is the thief of joy, so focus on you, and surround yourself with people who will encourage you and build you up.
Thirdly, and this is easily the most vague and cliche, but enjoy this. Seriously, enjoy it! You are going to travel the country and maybe even the world. You are going to move to cool places and meet new, fun people you never would have known otherwise. You are going to realize your strength through deployment and join the ranks of the few that get to experience one of life's greatest joys: homecoming. Military life is one great adventure, so enjoy the crap out of it.
Future military spouse, this life won't always be easy, but it will be amazing. Congratulations on an exciting adventure ahead. I'm rooting for you to love it as much as I have.
Sincerely,
A military spouse of 7 years that couldn't imagine life any other way
Awesome post hun! I love it!
ReplyDeleteThe second one is so true!!! Too often we compare what we cannot control and it's so frustrating. Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteSo true! I'm grateful for you giving me this advice as I went through being in a relationship with and then engaged to my military man!
ReplyDeleteKimber
I whole heartedly agree.
ReplyDeleteI definitely think we should always choose to Thrive and enjoy, otherwise we'll get consumed by all the negativity.
I'm still working on the compare area. I'll admit that It still ruffles my feathers when others do complain about their husbands business weekends or what not. I think that comes from me getting married later in my twenties, and holding on to that dream of what I thought "my marriage" would look like. BUT I'm learning how fast the small moments we do have together can be magical, precious, and ones I wouldn't trade for anything.